


Bitter Water

by Rainbow_squirrels_7



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebels, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Asexual Character, Asexual Relationship, F/M, Fluff and Humor, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, a few other clones are mentioned, obi-wan is also mentioned but he never shows up, padme is mentioned too, rexsoka renaissance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2020-12-23
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:28:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28253151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rainbow_squirrels_7/pseuds/Rainbow_squirrels_7
Summary: But I still taste you on my lips,lovely bitter water.Terrible fire of old regretis honey on my tongue.And I know I shouldn’t love you,I know I shouldn’t love you,but I do.-Bitter Water, The Oh Hellos[or: life is short, there are only a few good things in it, really. you shouldn’t pretend that one isn’t happening. Rex and Ahsoka are each the other’s good thing]
Relationships: CT-7567 | Rex/Ahsoka Tano
Comments: 18
Kudos: 85





	Bitter Water

**Bitter Water**

  
  


“Mmm…” Fives lowered his mug after taking a sip and sighed, “Like making love in a canoe.”

Across the table, Jesse gave him an incredulous expression, one eyebrow raised, “Mess caf isn’t _that_ good, brother.”

“Exactly,” a wicked grin split across Fives’ face, “It’s _fekking_ close to water.”

“Fives!” With Ahsoka in between the two of them, Rex practically roared the name and clamped his hands on the sides of their young commander’s head- the padawan had joined her men for breakfast in the ship’s mess hall. The captain’s belated efforts were in vain, however, as Ahsoka had barked a loud laugh and dissolved into a fit of giggles, along with the other clones sitting around them. 

Hardcase pounded the table, himself shaking from laughter and his fist shaking the flatware- the forks and knives clinked against mugs and plates with each tremor, “Oh- oh, that’s a good one!” 

“‘Case,” Fives grinned again, “You got a little-“ he pointed to the corner of his own mouth. Hardcase tilted his eyes down, and swiped at his own chin with the back of his hand- he hadn’t even noticed part of his meal had been slung back up, hitting him in the face as he’d slammed the table. That gave him an idea.

Ahsoka watched intently as Hardcase arranged his food and utensils in front of him. The boys were glad for the marginally more palatable meals served in the _Resolute_ ’s mess hall, and she had to emphatically agree with them- even cafeteria food beat out the ration bars they ate on campaigns. 

Bright moments like this were something the padawan had started to look forward to, just spots of joy and laughter away from all the intensity of fighting a war- Ahsoka hoped that her master wouldn’t call her to the bridge anytime soon. Despite not having been commander of the 501st for what could even conservatively be called a long time, she truly cherished spending time with her men. And despite _their_ initial reservations about following orders from a youngling (as Rex had called her at their first meeting), the clones had almost immediately switched gears in short order and accepted her among them; practically inserting her among their ranks, some tended to forget Ahsoka was their superior (explaining Fives’ crude joke), but the majority of them were fiercely protective (explaining Rex’s attempt to shield her from his brother’s crass language). 

“And… fire!” Ahsoka was startled out of her thoughts as Hardcase pounded the table again. The blue-tattooed clone eagerly slammed his fist down on a spoon balanced against a metal cafeteria tray- the makeshift catapult launching a glob of oatmeal with a _clang!_ towards Hardcase’s wide open mouth… only to hit him squarely in the eye. 

There was a moment of silence as oatmeal slipped down the clone’s face- this quiet was broken with a vehement and high-pitched “ _Kriff!”_ that Hardcase spat out with feeling, and the table erupted into another bout of hysterics, loud full-belly laughs and wheezes echoing around the mess hall. 

Ahsoka threw her head back, laughing along with them and clutching her stomach. Tears of mirth threatened to leak out of the corners of her eyes, and as she reached to wipe them away, she heard a “Whoa! Commander!” from Jesse, sitting on the other side of the table.

“What?” she asked, lowering her head to look at him.

Jumping to this new topic like it was nothing, Hardcase excitedly patted the blue-and-white gauntlet on Jesse’s arm, “Oh good! Man, I thought I was the only one who saw that!”

“Saw what?” A worried edge was creeping into Ahsoka’s voice, “What are you talking about?”

“Open your mouth again, Commander!” Jesse replied, like this cleared anything up. 

The padawan shot a quick glance at Rex, but the clone Captain didn’t seem concerned (Ahsoka had seen him glare at his brothers before at times when their shenanigans went too far), and was instead looking on with kind of an amused grin, so she obliged the strange request. 

The two on the other side of the table went wild. Hardcase was shoving his brother, shaking his shoulder and almost shouting, “See? See, I told you!” 

Now this was officially too weird for Ahsoka, “Okay, what’s going on? What’s wrong? Do I have something in my teeth?”

“Yes!” Jesse’s eyes were wide, his raised eyebrows distorting the Republic cog tattooed on his bald head just a bit, “You’ve got fangs, Commander!”

“Um, yes?” Ahsoka wasn’t following, “I do?”

To her left, Fives leaned forward to look in her direction. “You’ve got fangs, sir? Like a Rancor?”

“More like a Loth-Cat,” Rex muttered, smiling, and Ahsoka elbowed him in the ribs (it did nothing with his armor on, but Ahsoka felt she made her point clear). 

“All Togruta have fangs,” she grinned, baring hers wider and Fives’ eyes could have popped out of their sockets. “Did you guys really not notice ‘till now? Or- wait, did you not see Master Ti’s?”

“General Ti’s got fangs, too?” was Jesse’s surprised response, and Ahsoka took that as a negative. She thought it a bit strange- Master Shaak Ti was practically the only other of her own species Ahsoka knew, and the Togrutan Master just so happened to be the Jedi liaison with the Kaminoans and their cloning facilities; she was one of the few non-human (and non-Kaminoan) beings nearly every clone came into contact with before being shipped off to the frontlines, so how could they not have realized that?

The padawan turned back to Jesse, telling him that of course Master Ti had fangs, while Rex looked thoughtful for a moment before speaking, “General Ti doesn’t laugh like you do, sir.”

That comment threw Ahsoka off, and she was suddenly self-conscious, “Oh, I… guess she wouldn’t. She _is_ a Jedi Master after all, we’re not really supposed to…” she trailed off, looking down, and started worrying the hem of her skirt between two fingers. 

“That’s… not a bad thing, Littl’un,” the padawan hadn’t looked up, so she didn’t see Rex’s confused expression. He looked to his gathered brothers for help, unsure of what to do with the girl’s abrupt change in mood. 

“If everyone was as dour as Kamino in monsoon season,” Fives started, and then leaned towards Ahsoka pseudo-conspiratorially, and stage-whispered, “that’s _every season_ ,” which earned him the smallest of smiles from the young commander, then straightened up to continue, “then the war would’ve been lost the moment it started.”

“Yeah!” Hardcase chimed in around a mouthful of food, “Laughin’ keeps you sane!”

“ _Nothing_ keeps _you_ sane, ‘Case,” Jesse’s dig scored him a shove from Hardcase, which his brother returned, and it would have devolved into a full-blown tussle if Rex hadn’t swiftly ordered them to cut it out.

“What we’re saying is,” Fives rested on his elbow on the table, scooting his tray out of the way. He nodded at Ahsoka, who had finally looked back up at the troopers around her, “We like your optimism, little one.”

“Hey,” Rex also leaned onto the table to see eye-to-eye with Fives and pointed a finger at him, “That one’s mine!” 

“You- you can’t claim a nickname all for yourself!” The goateed ARC trooper returned, hardly able to control his laughter to finish speaking.

“Of course I can,” Rex straightened and overdid his haughty expression just a little while smiling down at Ahsoka, making her hide a laugh behind her hand, “ _I’m_ Captain.”

They went back and forth like that (names were important to clones), and Ahsoka found herself smiling more and more. There was nothing in the Jedi Code that said she _couldn’t_ laugh and have fun; perhaps it was just the stoic mysticism of most of the older Masters who made it seem that way. As long as it didn’t get out of hand or become a distraction, Ahsoka figured it must be okay (though, then again, she and Master Skywalker weren’t exactly poster children for following all the rules). 

Just like she figured the attachment- love, really, she felt for these boys, and all their brothers under her command couldn’t be such a bad thing, either. As long as it didn’t get in the way of her being a Jedi, what harm could come from caring for the men that protected her, and whom she protected in turn?

Ahsoka supposed she was in for a lecture from her Master on the dangers of attachments, but even in the short time they’d known each other, she could already tell the man had his own issues with the same thing; Anakin grew close to anyone he even remotely considered a friend, Ahsoka saw it herself in the quick 180 turn his opinion of her did soon after she became his apprentice. 

It was something she’d think about later, she decided, shoving her confusion on the subject to the back of her mind.

And not a moment too soon, as Ahsoka noticed all of the four clones around her had joined in on the argument Rex and Fives were having, and Hardcase grabbed her attention with, “Let’s have the Commander decide!”

“What am I deciding?” the Commander in question asked sheepishly, not having been paying attention. 

Hardcase continued, “If Captain Rex gets to claim ownership of a nickname for you or not!” He jerked a thumb at Jesse, Fives, and himself, “We all think it’s ridiculous, sir.” 

“I doubt it’s in the regs for being a Captain,” Fives added, sounding very much like his fellow ARC, Echo (though Ahsoka doubted Fives had picked up, much less read through a regulation manual in his life), “no matter what he says.”

“Like you would know,” Rex countered, confirming the padawan’s suspicions. 

“I could be right,” Fives went on, and Ahsoka was looking back and forth between the two like she was watching a sporting event, “Since I know you can’t bluff to save your life.”

That one made Ahsoka sputter a laugh, “But- but _none_ of you can!”

Hardcase made a mock-offended face, “I’m hurt, sir! I can totally tell the best lie you’ve ever heard. Listen,” he raised a finger and took a deep breath as Ahsoka and the other three clones stopped talking and looked at him.

Hardcase’s face cracked into a grin as he simply said, “I was born a Mon-Calamari.”

The entire table instantly erupted into yet another bout of hysterical laughter, so loud that clones at other tables started to turn around to see what all the noise was about. Ahsoka saw a few of them grinning and trying to hide small chuckles- they probably hadn’t heard their brother’s joke, but the scene of five of them (some being of higher rank, even) absolutely _losing_ it was certainly enough to lift their spirits. 

_This_ was what was important, Ahsoka realized. This was the peace they were fighting for. Moments of joy and love shouldn’t have been as rare as they were; in all rights, they shouldn’t have _had_ to fight for them.

But since the universe and strings of fate had lined up in such a way that they _did_ have to fight, Ahsoka was at least glad it was for a cause like this. 

And once the war was over, she was sure every moment from then on would be as bright as this one. 

***

Oh, Rex had really done it, now.

He hadn’t been _meaning_ to find anything out- it’s just that some things were hard to ignore.

Especially if one of those things was his Jedi General’s supposedly secret relationship (marriage?!) with the Senator from Naboo- though Rex was almost certain that if he himself could figure it out, then they weren’t hiding it all that well. 

“I can order you not to tell.” Anakin’s fists were clenched, and the color rising in his face could have been from anger or anxiety. Probably both.

“I know, sir.”

“And you’re… still not going to say anything?”

“Well, sir,” Rex drummed his fingers over the crown of his helmet that was clasped in his hands, a nervous habit, “I don’t really understand all the Jedi business about attachments and all, but…” he sighed and looked his General in the eye seriously, “I do know that life is short. And there are only a few good things in it, really. You shouldn’t pretend that one isn’t happening.”

***

“So what is it, tonight?” Rex plunked down his mug and datapad onto the table, careful to avoid disturbing the many other ‘pads and pages that were already scattered about. He unclipped his helmet from his belt and set that on the table, too.

On the bench beside him, Ahsoka groaned and started rifling through leaves of flimsiplast, “Uh… flora and fauna?” She shoved the papers aside and reached for a datapad (Rex didn’t know how she was distinguishing between them), and then put it down and grabbed another, “Yeah- animals and plants on different planets.”

Rex leaned over her shoulder, taking a look at what she’d typed. “I don’t think lizard-monkeys are from Florrum,” he said, pointing at an entry.

“What?” The padawan frowned, looking back and forth between Rex and the datapad, “Anakin said he saw one there!”

“I doubt Hondo’s pet counts toward the native population.”

“Yeah… You’re probably right,” Ahsoka threw her head back, groaning again, her fangs glinting in the bright lights of the _Resolute_ ’s cafeteria. She poked at the datapad’s screen, erasing the answer, and then thought for a moment before asking, “Do you think they’d accept Tookas? Tookas are everywhere.”

Rex said that he wasn’t sure, and she tried to convince him further, while he just grinned at her from behind his caf mug, and turned his eyes back to his own work. They often sat in comfortable silence for hours at a time, only broken when Ahsoka would tell Rex a joke about whatever she found funny in her readings, or Rex would ask Ahsoka for her thoughts on a mission she’d been involved in. It had become something of a tradition for them to do paperwork together in the mess hall- with Rex writing reports and Ahsoka cramming her Jedi studies in at the very last minute. 

“We’re in the middle of a war,” she’d told him the first time he’d found her studying, soon after she became his Commander, “You’d think that’d excuse me from classwork! But noooo, I have to learn about _this_ guy from _that_ planet who met _some other_ guy from _some other_ planet and had fun or… whatever.” 

Rex had to agree with her on that- the padawan already spent so much time and energy on actively being a Jedi and _leading a kriffing army_ that every time Ahsoka had any small moment of rest, she had to use it catching up on assignments and essays for the book-learning parts of her apprenticeship. He didn’t think it was fair. But then again, he _also_ had to write up reports on the war effort: supplies numbers, civilian and army casualties, damage to ships, weapons, kit, and such- all while still being a Captain of the GAR. It _wasn’t_ fair, but at least they could bemoan it together. 

He’d been so engrossed in typing (the whole debacle with the prince on Mon Cala had been a few standard weeks before, and it was certainly one of the stranger reports he had written in a while- though no mission organized by the Skywalker/Tano duo was regular by any means), that he only noticed how late it had gotten when the mess lights dimmed as the cruiser entered its night-cycle. 

Then, suddenly, Rex felt a weight slump against his shoulder. 

He’d assumed Ahsoka had left earlier- she usually finished up her work and went to her own quarters to meditate or sometimes to the ship’s gym to practice lightsaber katas. She must have had more classwork to catch up on than usual, which wasn’t surprising given that she and her Master and the rest of the 501st had been burning the candle at both ends, running campaign after campaign for quite some time, not even counting her harrowing experience at the hands of the Trandoshan hunters (just _thinking_ about how scared she must have been, and how helpless he himself had been to stop any of it- to not have been able to help her- it made him so angry).

Rex _was_ surprised that she’d apparently chosen _him_ as a good place to sleep. 

He tried not to breathe too loudly, sure that any sound he made would wake her (Togruta have very sensitive hearing, he knew- the padawan’s incredible senses had saved him and his men many times over), all while looking around the room, wide-eyed. The cafeteria had cleared out, as late as it was.

Ahsoka must have fallen asleep without noticing, Rex decided- her shoulder was pressed up against his own, her body leaning towards him. She didn’t look incredibly comfortable, especially given he was still in his armor; he briefly considered picking her up and carrying her back to her own room, but quickly dismissed that idea- for one, he didn’t know the code to her door. For another, he knew it would be so incredibly outside of regulations that he forced that thought out of his mind hardly a second later, not even to mention the looks he was sure he’d get from his brothers should any of them see their Captain and Commander in such a situation.

“Commander,” he whispered instead, not really wanting to wake her up, but seeing no other option, “Sir, wake up.”

“Don’t… wanna…” Ahsoka’s words were so slurred together, Rex could hardly make them out. He wasn’t sure if she had even realized she’d spoken at all. The padawan stirred slightly but didn’t open her eyes; she actually pressed closer to him, snuggling in tighter, and Rex found his heart racing. He looked around again at the still-empty mess hall, and then back to Ahsoka, who was once again sound asleep.

“Alright, ‘Soka,” he said softly, threading a hand behind her back and under her arm, gently lifting her onto his lap instead, where she’d be at least marginally more comfortable while he finished his work. She curled up against him, resting her head on his chest, immediately falling back asleep- if she had woken at all. 

And at that moment, Rex knew he loved her.

*

_“Ah, I found_ _the canoe!”_ was what Fives _wanted_ to say when he walked into the mess hall early the next morning (Tup didn’t believe him, but Fives was _convinced_ the scrambled eggs were actually more edible if you got there right when the mess opened), but he held himself back- there wasn’t an audience to appreciate his comedy, anyway.

Of course he knew the Captain would never even _dream_ of doing anything of the sort that his joke implied (with _anyone_ much less _their Commanding Officer_ ; the boys would go out for drinks while on their few short leave periods, and some wouldn’t return to the barracks until the next morning, having spent the night in the company of some other being- some brothers paid for the ‘services’ as they were, some got lucky and found someone who wasn’t put off by the whole _clone_ thing. Fives knew it wasn’t true for _every_ clone Captain or Commander- most tried to set a good example, he assumed- but Rex hardly ever went out with his men. And when he did, his eyes never wandered, never admired any of the beautiful and handsome beings who cycled in and out of the Coruscanti taverns the 501st frequented. Frankly, he brushed off any attempts by those who were more forward, obviously made uncomfortable by their touch and repulsed by their risqué suggestions. Torrent Company and other members of the 501st who were closer to Rex thereby took it upon themselves to protect their Captain, nevermind his protests- all unconsciously and immediately deciding to defend him should any being insult or demean his preferences. Fives didn’t see the big deal, anyway- plenty of troopers preferred intimate male company to female, some went for both, even, or the many other gender identities that colored the galaxy- or none at all, like in Rex’s case- it was _nobody’s kriffing business)_. 

Seeing them like that, though- Ahsoka curled right up against Rex’s chest, her knees pulled up close to herself, Rex with his arms protectively around her, his chin resting on the space between her montrals; it was _almost_ enough to tempt Fives to go get Jesse and Hardcase, or at least to take a holo to blackmail the Captain later.

Because Fives did have his suspicions. Practically the entire 501st had. The only being who made Rex’s eyes go soft, the only person besides a brother whose touch he readily accepted, who he’d risk his life out of love for, not just duty- the only one for him was his Commander.

“Sirs?” He whispered, lightly tapping Rex’s shoulder and even that slight touch was enough to rouse the Captain. 

“Fives?” Rex looked blearily up at him, blinking, and then seemed to notice Ahsoka and remember where he was, and then glared back at Fives, “It’s not-! Don’t even think about it- I was writing the Mon Cala report and fell asleep on accident.” 

“I can see that, Cap,” Fives was desperately trying not to laugh, because the Commander was still asleep and he didn’t want to wake her. Plus, Rex was _somehow_ telling the truth (since the man could lie just about as well as a protocol droid), but Fives didn’t miss the splash of red that colored the tips of his Captain’s ears, “So how are you gonna get out of,” he raised his eyebrows and eyed back and forth significantly between Rex and Ahsoka (Rex’s face turned even redder at the gesture, and Fives _really_ wished he’d brought a holo-camera), “this?”

Rex just shrugged the best he could without disturbing Ahsoka, and the ARC stepped back and stroked his goatee for a moment, thinking. Then, excited, he stage-whispered, “Oh! Got it- you just pretend like you’re asleep, I’ll handle the rest.”

And without explaining anything more, Fives turned and ran out of the cafeteria, the double doors sliding closed behind him. The clone Captain was left staring after him incredulously, but he supposed he didn’t have any other ideas. A few minutes passed, and there was no sign of Fives’ return, so Rex settled his chin back onto the hollow space between Ahsoka’s montrals (it was nice to sit with her like this, some part of him thought- Togruta have a naturally cooler body temperature than humans, and she was… soft, he didn’t have any better way to describe it. Maybe it was just such a different feeling than his usual, sharp and stiff armor) and actually felt himself drifting back off to sleep, content to hold his Commander for just a little while longer. 

Then the doors _whiisk_ -ed open, and in barged Fives, yelling, “CAPTAAAIN!!! There’s a PUFFER PIG _loose_ in the AIR VENTS!”

Rex didn’t even process what his brother was saying, the noise was enough to jolt him fully awake. Ahsoka, on the other hand, awoke with a start and jumped (as much as she could from her position) in surprise, leaning back into Rex- both of them yelped when that was enough to send them toppling off the bench and onto the floor in a heap. 

Ahsoka was _very_ confused. She was… in the _Resolute_ ’s mess hall? Had she fallen asleep doing classwork? Her eyes were still blurry- in front of her were… a pair of duraplast boots below a blue-and-gray striped kama... Fives? She leaned her head back and… yep, that was Fives- the clone had a goofy grin on his face, but then again, he always had a goofy grin on his face. It was then that Ahsoka noticed she was on top of something. 

Or rather, someone. She saw a blue-and-black winged pauldron, and scuffed, white-and-blue armor covered in tally marks…

_Oh kriff, it’s Rex._

“Ohmigosh!” Ahsoka quickly scrambled off of him, standing, “I’m _so_ sorry, Rex- I don’t know what happened! I don’t even know how I ended up on- I hope I wasn’t squishing you- I don’t even know what’s going on-!” She felt her lekku darkening with a blush, but couldn’t stop rambling now that she’d started.

Rex was just laughing as he took her offered hand to help himself up, “It’s alright, Littl’un. You’re too tiny to squish me, anyway. ‘Specially with the armor.”

Ahsoka puffed out her cheeks and pouted at him, “I’ll be taller than you one day, just you wait.”

The clone Captain was about to retort, but was interrupted by a dull _clang_! that echoed down the hall outside the cafeteria doors- the sound of metal-on-metal.

“Fives,” Rex turned and glared at his brother, “What was that?”

“There’s a puffer pig _loose_ in the air vents, sirs!” Fives repeated, putting stress on ‘loose’. 

Rex’s jaw dropped, “You’re actually serious?”

“No, I’m Fives.” Fives said quickly, but then noticed his Captain’s unamused expression, and amended, “I’m serious, sir.”

“I thought you-“ Rex cut himself off and groaned, scrubbing a hand down his face, “I swear I’m going to- I _thought_ I saw Jesse and Hardcase acting suspicious,” he grumbled under his breath, and then narrowed his eyes at the ARC in front of him, “You wouldn’t happen to know anything about this, would you, trooper?”

“N-no, sir!” but Fives wouldn’t meet his gaze, glancing around nervously.

Rex rolled his eyes and turned back to Ahsoka, “I’ll go take care of this, Commander.” He rested his hand on her shoulder for just a moment before grabbing his helmet and reattaching it to his belt, then heading to the door. Fives started after Rex, hiding giggles behind his back as the Captain marched angrily down the hall. He stuck his head out the door as Rex stomped away, holding a hand to his mouth to shout, “And for the record, sir- I told them not to do it!”

“What’re Hardcase and Jesse doing with a puffer pig?” Ahsoka asked as he turned, raising an eyebrow marking at him.

“That’s not important,” Fives replied with a wave of a hand, “All that matters is that _I_ win the bet... provided it actually _can_ fit inside the air vents over the bridge.” 

“Why do you do this?” the padawan asked with a smile, clearly amused despite her words.

Fives chuckled and started towards the other end of the mess, hearing the serving window open up, “Someone’s gotta keep people sane.”

“More like on their toes,” Ahsoka countered, following him, “I doubt Rex sees it that way.”

“Prob’ly not…” He went quiet for a moment, “You know,” Fives looked back over his shoulder at her. Ahsoka was surprised to find that the ARC’s grin was a sincere one rather than his usual joking expression, “He smiles more when you’re around.”

“How would you know? He’s always frowning at you.” 

“Ouch. But fair point,” the clone shrugged and laughed, “It’s like I told you before, Commander- we like your optimism. ‘Specially Captain Rex, even if he doesn’t say so.”

Grabbing some breakfast trays (eggs weren’t even being served that morning, Fives noticed with disappointment), they returned to the table Ahsoka and the Captain had been sitting at the night before, righting the bench that had fallen over in the process. The padawan scooted her datapads and loose sheets of flimsiplast out of the way, pushing them into an unorganized jumble on the other side of the table, and sat down across from Fives, immediately digging into her meal (it was mostly made up of breakfast sausage patties, the ARC noticed, remembering her kind’s carnivorous nature). 

“What were you two doing in the mess so early, anyway?” Fives tried to keep his voice neutral- shoving food into his mouth all the while certainly helped.

Ahsoka shrugged, “I was studying last night, he was writing reports- we do it all the time. ‘Guess it just got late and we fell asleep here without noticing.”

“And you’re… not looking further into that?”

“Fives!” the ARC watched the blue stripes on Ahsoka’s lekku turn more of a navy color- a Togrutan blush, he supposed, “I’m a Jedi!”

“Yeah, yeah! I know!” Fives’ voice went an octave higher than usual, and he held up his hands in a placating gesture, “Just asking!”

*

_“What does ‘Rex’ mean?” she suddenly heard herself ask, the thought springing unbidden to her mind. They were sitting on the floor of the hangar, leaning against one of the control consoles as the_ Resolute _made its way through another long hyperspace trip. Ahsoka often enjoyed looking out the overhead viewport, into the hypnotizing blue and white tunnel of whirling stars, finding the experience meditative, especially after a tough mission- she was occasionally joined by her Captain. Together, they could distract themselves from the war that raged around them._

_“What?” Rex’s reply was short, but Ahsoka couldn’t tell if he was just surprised by the question, or if she’d offended him- she knew how important names were to clones._

_“The other clones, their names seem to mean something, like having to do with them personally,” there was no stopping now- Ahsoka thought she may as well continue, no matter how the words seemed to pour out of her mouth, “Like how Fives’ is for his CT number, and when Echo was here, he told me he always used to repeat orders during drills, or how Tup’s is for the top knot in his hair.”_

_Rex grinned, “Tup’s is a hard one to figure out, even if you see him without the bucket- nice job putting that one together.”_

_Ahsoka shrugged, “Yeah, I’m still lost on Jesse and Kix, though. Not even to mention Coric and Appo.”_

_“Oh, they’ve got some stories,” the Captain chuckled, “I’m sure they’d tell you if you asked.”_

_“Is that okay?” The padawan leaned forward to look at him, worried, “It’s not… rude?”_

_Through the Force, Ahsoka felt a warmness emanating from Rex’s chest- she didn’t often use her abilities to read into others’ emotions, but sometimes, it just happened unconsciously. Especially if the feeling was a strong one, and it was so rare that Rex showed his emotions outwardly, keeping up his well-earned image of an unflappable soldier. Ahsoka knew him better, though, and felt honored to be one of the few who he trusted to show more of himself to._

_“That you’d even ask that…” Rex was smiling, shaking his head, “You’re too kind, Commander- we don’t deserve you.” At one time, Ahsoka knew he would have snapped his mouth shut, immediately apologizing for words he saw as an overstep of military code, but she’d told him again and again that he could always be honest with her, especially when they were alone or off the battlefield. She’d tried to spread the sentiment to the other troops, but was only sometimes successful- not as much as she had been with Rex, who seemed to jump at the chance, at least when General Skywalker or other higher-ups were out of earshot; when he felt safe enough to. Ahsoka felt_ waves _of warm light: sincerity, thanks, gratefulness- they were so strong, she couldn’t help but pick up on them. He was appreciative of even the smallest gesture of consideration; expecting so little that even the lowest bar of basic decency was incredible to him- Ahsoka was sad he and his brothers didn’t think they deserved it, were_ taught _to believe that._

 _“C’mon, Rexter,” Ahsoka rolled her eyes, but then gave him a smile, placing a hand on his bracer, “You guys are worth it._ You’re _worth it.”_

_He smiled back at her and fell against the console, leaning a bit closer to her so she could rest her shoulder against his. Ahsoka knew how he didn’t always appreciate touch from people other than his brothers, but he never seemed to shrug off hers, not flinching away from her hand on his arm, moving closer to make her more comfortable. It was sweet._

_(Some part of Ahsoka wanted to lean her head down on his shoulder, wanted to wrap her arms around his waist and just press herself against him. His presence was so comforting, so steady. More than anyone else, even her Master, Rex made her feel_ safe- _a feeling that was in short supply. She loved him for that, despite the Jedi teachings that blared warnings against it in her head.)_

_“So?” Ahsoka prodded, and knew he could see her grin out of the corner of his eye, “What’s your name mean?”_

_He paused for a moment, “‘Rex’ means ‘_ king’ _,” he told her, “Don’t know in what language, though- maybe some old type of Mando’a,” his eyes grew pleasantly distant as he reminisced, “Picked it out myself, after I was put on track for higher command. Thought it’d be fitting, y’know?”_

_Ahsoka agreed, nodding, “It suits you.”_

_There was another short pause, and then he asked, “What does ‘Ahsoka’ mean?”_

_Ahsoka herself was startled- the men so rarely used her given name, no matter how many times she insisted that she didn’t need to be called ‘Commander’ or ‘sir’ all the time. Her name sounded nice in Rex’s accent, she decided._

_“Oh! It’s uh, it’s an old Togruti word,” the padawan replied, “Way back in ancient history, my people were divided into a bunch of different groups all across the planet, but they were united by a ruler called Ashoka,” she moved her hands animatedly as she talked, and he watched, “His dynasty brought war and conquest, but it also spread culture and religion to all of Shili.”_

_Rex was listening intently- clones didn’t often get to hear tales of the past. Ahsoka continued, “But anyway, his name was ‘_ Aśoka’ _in the old language- it means ‘_ without sorrow _’; that’s what I was named after.”_

_“Suits you,” Rex echoed her earlier sentiment._

_Ahsoka hummed in agreement. And they both settled into comfortable silence, contentedly watching the expanse of space as it whirled by._

*

Both she and Fives were both silent for a few awkward moments, there. “Attachments like that…” Ahsoka suddenly seemed very interested in pushing the food around on her plate rather than eating it, “They… aren’t allowed, anyway.” To Fives, she almost sounded… disappointed.

Well, a disappointed Commander just simply wouldn’t do for Fives. “Y’know, that’s something I never understood about your Jedi rules,” he took another bite of his breakfast and pointed his fork at Ahsoka, “The whole ‘attachment leads to the dark side’ thing- so what, you’re not allowed to like anyone or anything?” He leaned closer, overdramatizing his worry, “You like me, right?”

Ahsoka laughed and pushed him back down into his seat, “‘Course I like you, Fives! It’s not- that’s not how it works.”

Fives looked at her expectantly, his chin in his hands, almost like a student in a class, as she started to explain, “Attachment itself isn’t what leads to the dark side- it’s the fear of losing that attachment that does. It makes you not think clearly and become open to corruption by evil.”

The area around them started to become more active, other clones joining the cafeteria line and sitting down in groups at tables. The ARC trooper across from her chewed thoughtfully, “I guess that tracks, but,” he swallowed, “But it just seems kind of hypocritical- oh, ‘scuse me, Commander- permission to speak freely?”

“Of course,” Ahsoka nodded at him, “You don’t need to ask.”

“Eh, that doesn’t feel right,” Fives rubbed the back of his neck, “But anyway, it seems a bit hypocritical-“

Ahsoka didn’t get to hear the rest of what he was going to say because a metallic clanking sound echoed from above them. Conversation stilled in the room as a number of clones glanced around, some looking up in confusion.

“Oh, no,” was all Fives had the chance to say before a durasteel panel dropped from the ceiling, crashing onto the ground, sending nearby troopers diving for cover. Ahsoka rounded the table and saw that a cloud of dust and debris had floated up, and she quickly cleared it with a wave of her hand. 

In its place, standing on top of the fallen panel was a very round, tannish and spotted creature. It had small horns, a few lines of dull spines down its back, plus a bulbous nose, short trunk, and bulging eyes. Those eyes were looking around, almost frantically, and Ahsoka could hear short, high-pitched squealing sounds forming in its throat, threatening to rise in volume. 

“Alright, nobody panic,” Fives had stood up, and he had his hands raised out toward his brothers, some of whom were still picking themselves off the floor from their impromptu duck-and-cover. The clones who had gathered for breakfast had quickly cleared an area, and were ringing it like spectators at a sporting event, with the odd creature in the middle. The ARC trooper was keeping his voice level, almost like he was speaking at a hostage negotiation, “As long as we remain calm, we can get through this without any problems, and,” he looked up and eyed his brothers, “no one will get in trouble.” The last part scored him a few scattered chuckles. 

“That’s a puffer pig,” Ahsoka realized, remembering having seen an entry on the creatures in her studies the night before. She turned to Fives, “I thought you said it was headed towards the bridge?”

“I _thought_ it was!” Fives replied, seemingly just as surprised, “Maybe it got lost?”

The padawan was racking her brain, trying to remember anything important that she’d read, “We just have to keep from startling it- if it gets scared, it’ll puff up and be impossible to deal with.”

“Thought so. Sounds easy enough, though,” squaring his shoulders, Fives started to walk forward slowly.

The clone audience had collectively taken a few steps back, most probably familiar with Fives’ particular brand of shenaniganery and not wanting to get involved. The puffer pig, meanwhile, had started to sniff curiously at the ceiling panel that had dropped to the floor along with it itself. 

Ahsoka had positioned herself across from Fives, who had moved to be in front of the creature- it was now in between the two of them, “I’ll herd it towards you,” she said, nodding at him, “You just be ready to grab it.” 

“Got it, Commander,” Fives tossed her a two-fingered salute and a grin and then refocused his attention back on the puffer pig. 

Meanwhile, Ahsoka tried to project waves of calming energy through the Force towards the scared animal. She spoke in a hopefully-soothing tone, “Okay, cute little piggy- you just go on over to Fives now, alright? Then we can get you back to where you came from.”

It seemed to be working- Fives was just a step away from being able to throw his arms around the creature… when another metallic noise clanked through the ceiling from up above. 

And multiple things happened at once.

Two screaming figures dropped out of the air ducts at the same time, landing with the sound of clattering armor. They both started groaning, and after a moment of shock, Fives yelled, “Jesse?! Hardcase?! You weren’t supposed to _follow_ the pig into the air vents!”

But the ARC’s shouts were drowned out by another sound, which was the sound of panicked, high-pitched squealing coming from the pig in question. Before anyone could react, the puffer pig did what it was named for, inflating out into a perfectly round, stubby-limbed version of its former self, and for the second time that morning, several troopers jumped out of the way as it started to wobble, now significantly lighter and more unstable than before.

Jostled by that movement and the two clones’ unceremonious fall into the room, the pig, much larger and more spherical than it had been moments before, started to bounce and roll toward a far corner of the cafeteria. Ahsoka pointed at it, catching Fives’ attention where he had been helping up (whilst scolding and/or laughing at) his brothers, shouting, “After it!” 

They immediately gave chase, vaulting over tables and chairs that had been knocked over in the pig’s frantic escape attempt. Ahsoka watched it uselessly (but cutely) fail its now-tiny arms and legs, probably trying to halt its own hectic bouncing, but only succeeding in changing its trajectory slightly to the right. Towards the mess exit doors. 

“Flank it on the other side, Fives!” For a moment, Ahsoka thought she could have been giving orders in a firefight, “We can’t let it get out of the mess!”

“Yes, sir!” Fives sprinted over to where he was told, but they were quickly running out of room. Ahsoka shuddered to think of what would happen should the gigantic, rubbery creature be set loose into the rest of the _Resolute._

“Now push it towards me!” The padawan stopped running and held out her hands, channeling the Force as Fives shoulder-checked the pig in her direction. 

“No! Not that hard!” Ahsoka caught it in mid-air, and its momentum carried the puffer pig the short distance to the exit’s threshold. With an elastic, squeaking sound, it settled perfectly- stuck exactly within the open space of the mess hall doorway. The sliding doors on either side of it, sensing its presence, tried to move open and closed every few moments, but only resulted in jiggling the creature slightly every time. It was well and truly stuck. 

Wordlessly, the ARC and the Commander went to stand in front of the doors.

“Well,” Ahsoka could tell Fives was trying not to laugh, as they two of them admired their handiwork, “It’s still in the mess,” he looked to the side and saw that the front half of the pig was sticking out into the hallway, “Most of it, anyway.”

Ahsoka couldn’t help it after that- she burst out laughing. Fives couldn’t hold it in any longer either, and he joined her- both cackling at the ridiculousness of the situation. 

She was leaning against him, nearly doubled over in hysterics when a familiar shout came from the _other side of the pig_ , “FIVES! I _know_ you’re behind this!”

“Oh _kriff_ it’s the Captain,” the ARC in question muttered under his breath while Ahsoka smothered another giggle behind her hand. Fives stood to attention, even though Rex couldn’t see him, “I… am, sir! From your perspective! From mine, _you’re_ behind it!”

Ahsoka could almost hear Rex rolling his eyes, “You’ll be on KP for this, soldier! And Jesse and Hardcase- don’t think you’re getting out of it, either!” From clear across the mess hall, the two accused clones startled and groaned, then hid their groans with muffled ‘yes, sir’s. No one liked the busywork of kitchen duty. 

“The Commander’s here, too, sir!” Fives piped up, and this earned him a dig in the ribs from said Commander, beside him. 

“Fives!” Ahsoka hissed, and the ARC actually flinched subtly at the sight of her somewhat intimidating expression- her lips pulled back, revealing sharp incisors, “I wasn’t even part of this!” She faced the pig, yelling, “Rex, I wasn’t even part of this! Don’t put me on KP, too!”

There was a pause, then she heard Rex sigh, “Alright, but you’re still helping clean this up. Starting with this one,” there was a _whump!_ sound as Rex must have tapped the still-stuck puffer pig between them, and it wiggled a bit. 

Fives leaned closer to her and whispered in a sing-song tone so Rex couldn’t hear, “Captain’s favorite gets lighter punishment!”

Ahsoka shoved him again, “Shut up, Fives.”

Fives just shrugged and smirked at her, turning and heading back to the other side of the mess, righting a few tables and chairs as he went. 

“Should I just… start pushing it?” Ahsoka asked Rex, looking the creature up and down, “You could close the blast doors on your end, and once it’s through, the mess doors will close too, and there’ll be nowhere for it to go.”

“Good idea, sir!” The padawan heard a few beeps and boops as Rex must have found a wall control console, and this was followed by two short, metallic _bang!_ s of the heavy blast doors sliding shut, out in the hallway. That, in turn, was followed by a, “Ready, Commander!” 

“Alright!” Ahsoka braced her hands against the rounded creature- its tan-spotted hide was surprisingly more soft than it looked. It wobbled with even the smallest movement, but did not seem to loosen from its position, no matter how hard she pushed. 

“You can see its legs, right?” Ahsoka called, and after an affirmative from the Captain on the other side, she continued, “Try pulling it, I’ll keep pushing! Ready- on the count of three!”

On three, the padawan shoved forward again, putting a bit of the Force behind her action. The puffer pig had begun to squeal in protest, the sound grating against Ahsoka’s montrals- really not helping anything in the whole process. But then, there was another, drawn-out squeaking, stretching noise followed by an almost comical _pop!_ and Ahsoka yelped and suddenly was propelled forward through the threshold after the pig, the sliding doors closing shut and just barely missing her boots. 

For the second time just that morning, she crashed into Rex, and the two of them ended up in a heap on the ground. 

A few thoughts sprang to mind as Ahsoka picked her face up off of her Captain’s chestplate, her hands on his shoulders- one of them being a witty ‘ _we really have to stop meeting like this’,_ and the other being an apology, but didn’t get to say either, as Rex brought her head back down against his chest, shouting, “Look out!”

With strength that really shouldn’t have surprised her, Rex pulled her against himself and rolled the both of them onto their sides, his hands braced on the ground on either side of her, balancing on his knees, holding himself carefully above and away from her body. It took Ahsoka half a second to realize he was using himself to shield her… because the puffer pig was bouncing around and ricocheting off the walls. 

“How do we get it to shrink back down?” Ahsoka rolled onto her back and flinched every time the creature hit a wall, the metal paneling clashing and pounding with every impact- it was incredibly loud, not even counting the pig’s squealing, a sound that hadn’t let up since it started. 

“I don’t know!” Rex’s amber eyes were wild as he looked around the room, trying to follow the pig’s trajectory, leaning closer every couple seconds to avoid getting squished, “Do you think you could-?” but Ahsoka didn’t get to hear his suggestion, because the blast door to their right cycled open with the blare of an alarm tone and a loud _kwssh_!, the unexpected sounds and burst of light sending the hysterical creature down yet another spiral of panic. And unbelievably, it puffed out even _more_ , and then was silent.

The air was knocked from Ahsoka’s lungs with an ‘ _oof!’_ as Rex’s arms gave out and he was pushed down against her abruptly; the already-confined hallway space was now completely filled with puffer pig, almost as if the creature was liquid filling a container. 

Rex was barely able to keep the two of their faces from crashing into each other (which would have probably led to some accidental injuries vis-à-vis Ahsoka’s fangs and Rex’s head) but only just. Ahsoka could see the deep splash of red that was rising in his cheeks, and in the quiet, could actually hear his heart racing frantically, could feel it pounding against her own chest through his armor.

The quiet was broken by a low and startled-sounding, “Whoa.”

“Master?” Ahsoka called, and Rex winced at her practically yelling in his ear. She grinned sheepishly, “Sorry!” and repeated, quieter this time, “Master, is that you?”

“Ahsoka?” Came the reply, and it was definitely Anakin’s voice, “Where… are you? All I see is… is this a puffer pig?”

“We’re under the pig! Me and Rex!”

“You and-“ Anakin stammered unbelievingly for a moment, “What- what are you two doing under the pig? Where did this pig even come from?” 

“It’s a long story, General,” Ahsoka felt Rex’s chuckle rumbling through his chest, not an altogether unpleasant sensation- it was kind of soothing, in fact, “D’ya think you could help us out, sir?” 

“Uh,” Anakin sounded unsure, and Ahsoka pictured him rubbing the back of his neck, “I’m not as good with animals as Obi-Wan, but I’ll try my best.” 

Eleven minutes and a holocall to Obi-Wan later, the puffer pig was shrinking back to its original size. 

As soon as he’d had the space to, Rex had carefully lifted himself off of Ahsoka and sprawled out beside her instead, definitely wanting to avoid any awkward explanations to her Master finding the two of them in such a position. Ahsoka didn’t blame him, but still couldn’t help but miss the comforting weight and warmness that had come from his proximity. She would have preferred not being squished, though. 

Having completely deflated, the puffer pig dropped onto the ground, narrowly missing landing on Rex’s stomach, and was swiftly scooped up into Anakin’s hands before it could escape through the open blast doors. 

“You guys good?” Anakin stood above his apprentice and Captain, the two still lying on the floor. Apparently exhausted by the whole ordeal, the pig had fallen asleep in his arms, and Ahsoka watched him awkwardly pet it with his mechanical hand- her Master had always preferred machines over living creatures. 

Ever the soldier, Rex quickly picked himself up and offered Anakin a crisp salute, “Better now. Thank you, General.”

And ever the gentleman, he offered a hand to help Ahsoka up, which she accepted readily, jumping to her feet. “Yeah, thanks, Skyguy. You too, Rexter,” she gave Rex’s hand a squeeze before letting go, which made him blush a little, and she giggled. 

If Anakin noticed this interaction, he didn’t comment, and instead turned his attention to the sleeping puffer pig. “So… what’s the story with this? And… what in the galaxy are we gonna do with it?” 

***

Brighter moments like that were what Rex thought of on Umbara, and after- something that seemed unequivocally _good._

Because everything he’d ever thought, everything he’d ever believed had come crashing down, and in the ruins, he didn’t know what was right anymore.

***

Brighter moments like that were what Ahsoka called to her mind as she stood on trial for crimes she didn’t commit. She remembered them as she was cast out of the Order that had been her home and family her entire life. 

She remembered them as she walked away.

***

“She’s really coming back?” 

Rex almost didn’t dare to hope that what his General was saying could actually be true. For the 501st, the months since their Commander’s departure had been… rough to say the least. Tup snapping and killing a Jedi, his death and Fives’ investigation- him finding some impossible conspiracy about brain chips and a looming, shadowy plan, bigger than them all. 

And Fives died. And Kix went missing. And Echo was somehow alive after all this time, and then he left, too. And the General only withdrew further within himself.

Rex didn’t want to hope if he was only going to end up disappointed. 

Because he couldn’t _let_ himself be disappointed, at least not outwardly. All his men looked to him for inspiration, for courage- he couldn’t let them down, even if so few of the old guard were left, now; even if more members than he’d like to admit of 501st were all but unfamiliar to him, the troops getting replaced almost as if they were toy soldiers on an assembly line. 

But this… this was a hope he _really_ wanted to believe was true. 

He’d _missed_ Ahsoka. 

It’d been a completely foreign feeling- the whole time, he’d known his Commander was out there, somewhere, but he didn’t know where, and even if he had, there was no way he could have seen her or even contacted her. Her rank in the army had been forfeited when she left the Jedi; there was no way or reason for a civilian to talk to a clone. 

(He’d kept the thoughts as to _why_ he’d missed her so much to himself.)

And he’d noticed how… bad General Skywalker had been doing in her absence. He was quicker to anger than usual, jokes didn’t come as often or as sincerely, he was more ruthless in battle without her voice by his side. 

They missed her optimism. Fives had always said it, and only when Ahsoka was gone did Rex realize how true it was. How she always had a smile, or a joke, or a sarcastic comment, how she had her nicknames for those close to her (it had taken Rex a while to get used to her calling him ‘Rexter’-it was highly irregular, especially from a Commander to a Captain, but when she left, he’d have given most anything to hear her say it again). 

But now…

“She is,” and Rex could tell his General was supposed to say more, supposed to add something like ‘ _but I don’t know for how long’,_ or _‘I don’t know if she’s staying’,_ but he didn’t want to admit those things, make those things real out loud. Ahsoka was coming back, and that’s what was important. 

“Wow,” Rex didn’t realize he’d spoken, had breathed the word as a sigh until Skywalker smirked at him. Just the barest hint that the person who was basically Anakin’s little sister was coming back- it was enough to lift the General’s spirits higher than they had been in a long time, “You excited, Rex?” 

Rex snapped to attention on instinct, though it felt awkward and too forced, “‘Course I am, General. We all missed the Commander.”

“Mm-hmm,” Anakin hummed, “Haven’t seen you smile like that in a while.”

“Could... say the same about you, sir,” Rex hadn’t realized he’d been smiling, either- probably like an idiot. 

Anakin still fixed him with a gaze that Rex couldn’t quite interpret, somewhere between knowing and empathetic. “I guess that’s true,” he finally said, “It just… it seems unbelievable.”

 _‘Things can go back to normal, now_ ’ was what he left unspoken. 

“With your permission, sir- I’ve had this idea,” Rex found himself saying, halting through the words, “I never really gave up- I mean, the boys and I never really gave up on… on the Commander returning, someday.”

Anakin’s smile was surprisingly gentle, “I didn’t think you did.”

“My- the idea was…” the Captain avoided his General’s ice-blue gaze, wishing he had his helmet on, “I was thinking that we could paint our armor for her.” 

“That’s a great idea, Rex,” the Jedi was grinning widely, now, “I’ve actually been working on something of my own for her, too.”

“You don’t think it’ll be too much, sir?”

“‘Course not,” somehow, Anakin’s smirk read as sincere and witty at the same time, “It’ll show Ahsoka how much you and the guys love her.” 

Rex was sure that if Anakin didn’t hear his heart stop, he must have sensed it, being a Jedi and all. 

_Damn Jedi_ \- _of course he knew._

“Lov- I- I um...” Well, the Loth-Cat was out of the bag, now. Rex wasn’t even trying to bluff, and yet, he started stuttering, “Sir, you must know- I never did anything- I never meant- I would _never_ do- It’s completely against…” he took a few breaths and looked back up at Anakin, who seemed to be stifling fond laughter. 

“Hid it better than Padmé and I, that’s for sure,” Anakin crossed his arms, and his words only made Rex more embarrassed. 

Seriously, Rex said, “At your word, sir, I can drop this whole… matter. I _should_ drop it- it’s out of order and she probably doesn't even… We didn’t ever- I don’t think she even knows...” he trailed off, facing away, certain that the heat in his face revealed his true feelings, “I… I apologize for my conduct, sir- I’ll drop this immediately.” He said this even as he knew he wouldn’t be able to.

There was a pause, and Rex thought that was the end of it, but then he felt a hand on his shoulder. “A wise clone once told me,” Anakin turned the Captain back towards himself to look him in the eyes, “That life is short, and there’re only a few good things in it, really. You shouldn’t pretend that one isn’t happening.” 

It wasn’t the answer he’d been expecting. He’d expected Skywalker to be angry- Ahsoka was under Anakin’s protection, and Rex had thought the General would have seen it as a failure on his own part, no matter how hypocritical it made him. But this...

“Are you… sure, General?” It seemed too good to be true.

“Yeah, I’m sure. I trust you, Captain,” Anakin draped an arm across his shoulders, such a familiar gesture, Rex forgot for a moment that Skywalker wasn’t one of his brothers. He herded him towards the door, “You should go get started on that surprise of yours.”

“Of course, sir.” Rex gave him a sharp salute and turned, about to follow that exact suggestion, when Anakin called him again.

“Oh, and Rex?”

He faced him, seeing a smile of pure pride and joy on his General’s lips- it really was an expression of his the Captain hadn’t seen in a long time.

“I’m pretty sure she knows.”

In a daze, Rex must have stumbled through a ‘yes, sir’ or a ‘thank you, sir’, but he honestly didn’t remember- and he didn’t remember ever feeling so happy in his life, either. He also must have navigated to the barracks on autopilot, because the next thing he knew, he was sitting on the edge of one of the cots, a few brothers gathered around, listening to something he was saying. 

“Cap?” Jesse waved a hand in front of his face, “You still in there?”

“Oh, yeah,” the movement brought Rex out of his thoughts, “Sorry, what was I saying?”

“I… don’t know, sir,” though his ARC armor was still relatively new, Jesse seemed to have settled into it as if he’d worn it his whole life. He continued, “You just called us here saying you had an announcement.” 

“Right,” Rex nodded and then faced them all seriously, “Commander Tano’s coming back.”

Jesse, Appo, and the other older clones immediately startled, most not even hiding their gasps of surprise. Appo’s eyes could have popped out of his head, “What do you- you’re serious?”

“Who’s Commander Tano?” One of the newer guys- Hustle, Rex thought, piped up. 

“You ever watch the HoloNews?” A shiny answered him, shoving his brother, “She was the General’s old apprentice!”

“She left the Jedi Order a few months ago,” Vaughn was leaning against a bedpost, sprawled out like this meeting had woken him up, “Long story.”

“But she’s really coming back, sir?” Jesse looked so excited, Rex couldn’t help but smile with him.

“In a few hours,” Rex nodded, “So that gives _us_ time to start our surprise.” He may not have told his brothers the _exact_ reason he’d thought up such an elaborate welcome home should their Commander ever return (he knew they had their suspicions- gossip was almost an art form to clones, and everything eventually found its way up to the Captain), but he’d always known that he would need help setting it up- so a few of the older boys who’d known Ahsoka were in on the plan. 

Appo seemed like he was having trouble staying still, “I bet the 212th would let us borrow some of their paint- their gold isn’t exactly the right color, but maybe we can mix it with something else.”

“I think Fives used to keep some red on him,” Jesse caught on, “It’s probably still in storage.”

The newer guys were looking around, confused but obviously excited, and Rex stood, drawing everyone’s attention. “Alright, boys,” he said, “Let’s get to work.” 

The word spread quickly through the 501st, and the painting party soon outgrew the barracks, moving into the mess hall. Rex strolled up and down between tables, the benches packed with troopers- many of them likely had never even met Ahsoka, but they’d probably heard of her exploits as Commander of their legion- that, or they were looking for something to do, and most clones actually enjoyed painting quite a bit. 

Appo and Jesse’s idea of mixing the two paint colors worked incredibly well- the rusty, orange hue was nearly perfect. A few times, Rex caught members of the 212th peeking into the cafeteria, curious as to what was going on (or making sure the boys-in-blue weren’t misusing their signature color). 

Rex decided not to paint over his own helmet so Ahsoka could recognize him more easily (he was also rather fond of his Jaig-Eyes design), and Jesse chose to keep his own Republic-cog-pattern as well, and was helping shinies paint theirs instead. It was an irrational fear that the Commander wouldn’t recognize them, Rex tried to convince himself of that- there was no way she could ever forget them. 

There was no way she could forget _him,_ right?

He shook that thought out of his head, and leaned over the shoulders of some nearby troopers to check on their progress. 

“She’s a Togruta like General Ti- she’s got these white lines on her face,” Appo was saying to one of the younger boys- Rex thought his name was Soapy (he hadn’t heard the story behind that one), “Like diamonds above her eyes and little swish marks on her cheeks.”

Soapy was watching Appo as the older clone pointed around his own face, miming where Ahsoka’s markings were. He looked back and forth from his helmet to the brother across from him, looking more and more uncertain. “This would be easier with a holopicture,” he said, finally.

“The Captain’s probably got some holos!” came Jesse’s teasing shout from a few seats down, his grin as wide as Coruscant’s skyline. 

Rex didn’t dignify that with a response, and instead snatched Soapy’s helmet out of his hands, grumbling, “Here, I’ll do it,” while reaching for a thin paintbrush. He didn’t need a holopicture to remember his Commander’s face, and only realized belatedly that his reaction to Jesse’s dig probably said more than bringing out a holo would have.

Oh, well.

Finishing the design, he handed Soapy his bucket back, and the helmet began a cycle around the mess hall, being passed between tables so the rest of the boys could use it as a reference. 

The mess doors _fwissh_ -ed open, and someone closer to them called out “General on deck!” Rex looked up to see Skywalker entering the room, something clutched in his mechanical hand- there was the sound of many benches scraping against the floor that began as troopers tried to stand up and salute him, but the Jedi quickly shut this down with an ‘at ease, soldiers’ as he walked by, a grin growing on his face as he admired their art. 

“Sir,” Rex was already standing, so he gave the General his own salute, which was returned with a nod, “What do you think?”

“Looks great, guys,” Anakin surveyed blue-and-white and now orange sea of helmets, “She’s gonna love it.”

There was that word again, and Rex was sure his face must have shown something, because Anakin snickered at him as he sat down. The General had never been as close to the clones as Ahsoka had been, but the Captain was glad to see Anakin insert himself between two of the newer boys and immediately start chatting with them.

“What do you have there, sir?” Achilles, one of the shinies asked (he’d named himself after the hero of some old myth or legend- Rex hadn’t heard it, though), oblivious to the fact that his batchmate, on the other side of the General had started moving almost robotically, not wanting to mess up in front of their superior. 

“Just a little something for my padawan,” Anakin set a thin box on the table, what he’d been carrying when he walked in. He opened it up, showing its contents to the clones at his table- inside were two silver cylinders, one longer than the other, weapons every clone immediately recognized as lightsabers, but only a few had ever seen them in action. The hilts almost glowed with how polished they were, a far cry from the state they had been in when Rex last had seen them- covered in grime and grit from that frantic chase through Coruscant’s sewers.

A few seats down from Anakin, Soapy mumbled a ‘whoa’ while Appo and Vaughn both gave low whistles. Achilles and the shiny on the General’s other side (Nine, Rex remembered- for his CT number that either had a lot of nines or a bunch of zeroes and a nine, that part he couldn’t recall) looked amazed, having only seen their General’s own single blade before. Down the table, Jesse stood, pushing down Hustle’s head to balance and get a better view- he called out, “Wow! Wizard, General!”

Anakin actually laughed at the ARC’s use of his old exclamation- some troopers had probably never seen their General in such high spirits, and they heartily joined in. 

Rex had heard rumors about the war ending. Those had come around every so often as the fighting had gone on, but it’d been _so long_. He couldn’t even begin to pretend that he knew what the end of the war would mean for himself and his brothers, but maybe, it would be like this. 

Well, with one addition. 

Ahsoka would be there, too. 

Rex didn’t imagine he could go through being separated from her again. He didn’t even get to say goodbye the first time; he didn’t want to ever _have_ to say it. 

But soon, he would get to say hello.

***

_“Paint job’s a little crude, but we think it gets the idea across,”_

_-_

_“Race you to the surface!”_

_-_

_“Beat you!”_

_“Some things never change,”_

_-_

_“I was hoping for Kenobi… Why are_ you _here?”_

_-_

_“Maul had a vision- a dream. A name came to him.”_

_“What name?!”_

_“Sky...walker.”_

_-_

_“Justice is merely a construct of the current power base- a base which, according to my calculations, is about to change,”_

_-_

_“Let me go! Let me die! YOU’RE ALL GOING TO BURN! WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIE!! You don’t know what you’re doing!”_

_-_

_“You didn’t tell them what Maul said about General Skywalker.”_

_“No, I didn’t.”_

_-_

_“Something on your mind?”_

_“As a Jedi, we were trained to be keepers of the peace, not soldiers. But all I’ve been since I was a padawan is a soldier.”_

_“Well, I’ve known no other way. Gives us clones all a mixed feeling about the war. Many people wish it never happened. But without it, we clones... wouldn’t exist.”_

_“Well, then perhaps some good has come from all of it,”_

_-_

_“Execute Order 66.”_

_-_

_“Find him. Find him- Fives. Find him! FIVES!”_

_-_

_“I am one with the Force, and the Force is with me... I am one with the Force, and the Force is with me.”_

_“I am one with the Force, and the Force is with me.”_

_-_

_“Rex? Are you okay?”_

_“... Yeah. Yeah, kid. I’m okay.”_

_-_

_“They’re too many. Besides, I don’t wanna hurt them.”_

_“I hate to tell you this, but they don’t care! This ship is going down, and those soldiers, my_ brothers _are willing to_ die _and take you and me along with them.”_

_-_

_“You’re a good soldier, Rex. So is every one of those men down there. They may be willing to die, but I am_ not _the one who is going to kill them.”_

_“So… we’re just going to surrender?”_

*

A gouge had been carved into the moon’s soil. Burning pieces of wreckage were littered about, sending plumes of dark and acrid smoke into the sky, alight with sparks of glowing red from fires that still had yet to go out.

How could everything have gone _so wrong_?

It took _days_ for Ahsoka and Rex to comb through the crash and find the bodies- though not all of them even had that. A singed piece of armor, the muzzle of a favored blaster, a single limb; too many times, pieces were all they found, and that was all that could be buried. 

Ahsoka cried for all of them. 

The Y-Wing that the two of them had commandeered was hardly equipped for an extended stay anywhere, lacking an interior outside of the separate cockpits. They set up a sparse camp beside it, instead. Neither of them spoke, much- and it broke Rex’s heart over and over again to see Ahsoka’s beautiful face so marred by pain and grief, expressions that just didn’t belong there. 

Ahsoka never wanted to see the dull lack of emotion in Rex’s eyes again, what she had seen when the chip had taken him over. Looking over the crash for the first time, it was hard not to flinch when he faced her, because he was so _empty_ \- like he had been, then. She’d forgiven him- it hadn’t been his fault, was _never_ his fault. And she loved him when he pulled her close to himself, then, and they both stood, just holding each other in the wake of all the devastation.

Neither of them were in the best state: Rex’s winged pauldron had been shot completely through- a lucky miss among many others that did hit their marks; Ahsoka’s arms were practically shredded and covered in ash and burns, plus there were the deep gashes left by blaster bolts to her shoulder and knee; the incision from Rex’s rushed surgery to remove the inhibitor chip had to be meticulously looked after. Ahsoka had found a med kit in the ship, and on the first night, they treated each other’s wounds- both had exacerbated their injuries while searching and searching through the wreck immediately after landing, desperate to find _someone_ alive, not wanting to stop to heal themselves if it meant they could save somebody. 

During the war (it was over now, wasn’t it?), they had camped in worse places. But neither of them could fall asleep the first night, lying awake in silence because every time either of them closed their eyes, they would see the horrors all over again. 

Rex saw his dull-eyed brothers, voices devoid of emotion, unable to hear anything above a screaming cacophony of drums between their ears, behind their eyes- and an endless stream of _goodsoldiersfolloworders goodsoldiersfolloworders goodsoldiersfolloworders_. He saw the guns of his brothers pointed at him, guns pointed at Ahsoka- and that was always worse. But the constructed vision that would forever haunt his mind showed him his own shaking hands, pistols grasped in his fists, aiming at his Commander, his Commander whom he loved more than anything- and he can’t stop himself that time, can’t hold himself back from pulling the triggers for long enough. 

And Ahsoka saw Rex in that briefing room- his helmet clattering to the ground and being knocked aside. She saw his trembling hands, heard him say in a voice that _wasn’t him_ : ‘ _No, I’ll do it.’_ She saw the brothers she couldn’t save. She saw Anakin ( _she didn’t_ feel _her Master anymore- she’d_ never _not been able to feel him, even after she’d walked away)_ , Obi-Wan, her friends, her teachers, her _family_ all shot down by the soldiers they had trusted to protect them. The galaxy felt _empty_ and it’d been split apart, cracking in half from the weight of some great change- and Ahsoka felt _all of it._ And at the same time, she felt nothing at all. 

She didn’t realize that she’d started crying until she heard a soft word, Rex’s voice beside her, “‘Soka.”

There were tears on his face, too, and Ahsoka reached for his outstretched hand, immediately twining their fingers together. But that wasn’t close enough, and they both felt it. 

Rex must have seen it in her eyes, because he gently pulled her close against himself, and she wrapped her arms around his torso, pressing her head against his chest. Ahsoka felt him settle his chin onto the hollow space between her montrals, putting his own arms tightly around her- and that felt familiar for some reason, but it was _good,_ it was _safe_. 

She absently rubbed circles into his back with her thumbs, focusing on the material of his black shirt, listening to his steady heart in his chest- counting the beats, _he’s alive, he’s still alive, we’re both still alive_ \- anything to distract herself from her memories and the deafening silence that now permeated the galaxy.

They found Jesse on the second day.

Ahsoka knelt beside Rex, and held his hand while he sobbed for his brother, forced to his knees with pain. 

She felt hot waves of sorrow rolling off of Rex through the Force, tinged with shame- and it broke her heart when he turned away from her, not wanting her to see his tears. 

“You don’t have to be strong,” Ahsoka’s whisper cut through the silence, something of a croak after not having spoken for some time. She squeezed his hand as he nodded slowly, fresh tears welling up in his eyes. She gently wiped them away with a thumb, a hand cupping his cheek, and he leaned into her touch.

They buried his brothers together, sticking twisted rods of metal or parts of blasters into the soil upright, resting their helmets onto them as makeshift grave markers. Ahsoka spoke quiet eulogies meant for a Jedi funeral over each of them, _“Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter,”_ and Rex rasped out a few words about each trooper’s accomplishments, giving the ones he didn’t know as well the sharpest salute he could, like he would to someone of the highest rank. 

They had to leave, and would, the next morning. Ahsoka had turned on the ship’s radio on the second night, it crackling to life to fill the silence as they sat, backs up against the ship, Rex’s arm around Ahsoka’s shoulders, her head leaning against his chest- for fear they’d fall apart without each other’s touch, still not trusting themselves enough to put words to what they’d gone through. They were just barely able to pick up a signal on the barren moon they’d crashed onto, somewhere between Mandalore and Coruscant. And they caught snippets of what had happened:

The Jedi turning against the Republic.

The clones marching on the Temple.

The death of Senator Amidala.

The Empire.

Ahsoka switched off the radio.

So, that was it. They were fugitives. They had to run- run and survive. Survive without a war, somehow- neither of them knew if they would be able to; war was all they’d known. 

But they had each other, and maybe, that’d be enough. 

***

They’d never grown apart- that had never been the reason they had to separate. It had been a question of safety.

A recognizable former Jedi traveling with a clone was a dead giveaway. Nevermind that Ahsoka had left the Order, nevermind that the Grand Army of the Republic no longer existed- it didn’t matter to the Empire. 

Still, they traveled together for some time after leaving the crash site on that moon- never staying in one place for long, they’d hop from planet to planet, exchanging one beat-up ship for another beat-up ship, staying for just enough time to scrape together some credits, and would leave at the first sign of trouble. If civilians started to talk, if they were recognized- if there was a _chance_ they were recognized, they would leave. 

And if the Empire increased its presence on a planet, sending more officers or stormtroopers or figures of authority, they would leave. And it was _so_ hard for both of them- the Empire, for all its promises of prosperity, safety, justice, and security… under its rule, the reality was anything but. The two of them would be in a market or town square on an unobtrusive Outer Rim world, and it would be impossible to ignore the haggard faces of civilians, their terrified eyes, bodies folding in on themselves when even one stormtrooper would march by. Ahsoka could feel it all through the Force- despite it becoming quieter in the time since Order 66- and would glance at Rex, beside her as always, his fists clenched as he forced himself not to act; she knew it was just as hard for him to simply stand by and do nothing as it was for her. 

“I wish there was something we could do, some way to help,” Ahsoka sighed to him, one night. They had rented out a small room near the mechanic’s shop both of them had started working at, as usual not having enough credits to afford lodging meant for more than one person (Rex always insisted Ahsoka take the one available bed, the gentleman he was, opting to sleep on a pull-out couch, or even on the floor in some of the less-desirable locations. Ahsoka would reluctantly agree, though more of her than usual would miss the feeling of his arms around her on that moon, how safe he made her feel. The Jedi Order was no longer extant- there was nothing, no Code stopping her from putting a voice to the feelings she’d had for so long; she didn’t even consider herself a Jedi anymore, and hadn’t for some time- but still, she hesitated). 

“I know, but it’s too dangerous,” Ahsoka was still getting used to seeing Rex in civilian clothes, unable to keep as tight a leash as he was used to on his blond hair- it was long for him, at least, sticking up an inch or so, instead of his usual short fuzz. He continued, whilst absently running a hand through it- the length annoyed him, Ahsoka knew, “Not that I don’t think we could take a few stormtroopers- it’s just, I don’t think it’s the time.”

Ahsoka knew he was right, but that didn’t make her feel any better about it. “I wish…” she started, and Rex must have heard the heaviness in her voice, because he looked up, concern etched on his face. In public, they didn’t talk about the war, or anything that came before the Empire, and when they were alone, that topic was avoided, too- they talked about anything else, no matter how mundane. They didn’t reminisce, remember the better yesterdays and friends and family that were gone, now. But Ahsoka couldn’t stop herself, “I wish… that everything could go back to the way it was,” she blinked, feeling her throat close and eyes start to blur with unshed tears, “when none of this had ever happened.”

Rex had crossed the room in a few steps, sitting down close beside her on the edge of the bed. He draped an arm over her shoulders, softly rubbing a thumb against her arm, “I know,” he said again, quietly, “Me, too.” 

It wasn’t too long later that they were on a different (but still backwater) planet, renting a different (but still small) room, flying a different (but still busted) ship. Ahsoka was leading Rex through a marketplace one evening, weaving through bustling townspeople, all concerned with their own business- and all in sour enough moods to tell you off for the smallest infraction. Ahsoka had her gray hood draped over her head (it fell over her montrals in a cute way that made her look like she had Loth-Cat ears, Rex thought), as a Togruta would attract more attention than a human, despite Rex being a clone- Rex actually doubted that many beings had seen a clone without his bucket on, or had even met one in person. 

Ahsoka had been having a strange feeling that entire day, like the Force was a line pulled taut, ready to snap at any moment. When it happened, she had only half a second of foresight, a scream of warning through the Force that made her catch her breath and her blood turn cold. 

Without saying anything, she gripped Rex’s hand on instinct and tugged him into a narrow, dark alley nearby. They pressed up against opposite walls, hardly having any room between them, her other hand clamped over his mouth so he couldn’t speak. Rex felt her deceptively delicate-looking fingers squeezing his hand in hers like durasteel, like a lifeline. 

Rex trusted her without question, could see the absolute terror in her eyes, felt her hands shaking against his skin- she’d felt something in the Force, something that terrified her. But Rex was still confused, until he heard the scream. 

There was a familiar _whoormp_ sound, the hiss of flesh and cloth being rent by a fiery blade, and the heavy _whump_ of a body hitting the cobblestones. 

Rex lifted Ahsoka’s hand away from his mouth, but kept his grip on it, nodding at her that he wouldn’t make a sound- and he risked a glance out into the square. 

Looking between stumbling, shocked townspeople, he saw a clearing had formed- it was ringed by beings who froze for a moment, staring, and then quickly put their heads down and walked away.

A lone, dark figure didn’t move, it just stood there, seeming to survey the crowd; anyone who met with its gaze lowered their eyes and backed away. 

That familiar, whirring sound of burnt ozone and plasma, a sound Rex hadn’t heard in a while still permeated through the air. The gray mist that drifted through the streets was bathed in a sickly, red light.

Because the dark figure was wielding a red lightsaber. 

It turned slightly, and, while ducking back into the alley, Rex saw it was wearing a helmet and black armor, only decorated with silver Imperial cogs on the pauldrons- a mockery of the symbol of the Republic. The lightsaber was strange, unlike any he’d seen: a circle of metal with a hilt in the middle, a blade sticking out of either side.

“The Empire has no place for traitors,” was all the dark figure growled to the assembled crowd, before sheathing its blades and stalking away. 

Rex felt Ahsoka press closer to him as the creature passed by the alleyway they were still hidden in. Her entire body was trembling, eyes tightly closed- she didn’t shift her position at all, her iron grip on his hands not loosening (and only loosening slightly) until some time later, long after the figure was gone. 

She didn’t let go of his hand as Rex started to lead her back to their small apartment room, whatever it was they had been looking for in the market was suddenly unimportant. Ahsoka followed along, numbly, still pressing up against him, only stopping for a moment while passing where the clearing had been.

The body was still in the street. 

Rex pulled her arm gently, with a quiet, “C’m on,” and she wordlessly started after him once again. 

He made a show of locking the door when they returned, hoping the somewhat empty gesture would calm Ahsoka down at least a little bit. She just sat down on the floor, back up against the bedframe, knees pulled up to her chest, and her face in her hands. 

“That… thing,” Ahsoka’s voice was hardly above a whisper as she spoke between her palms, “It was… after Force-sensitives.”

Rex folded his legs and sat in front of her, unsure if he should speak or not. 

“It was o-only luck that I sensed it in time,” Ahsoka sniffed as she went on, “If- if I had been just a _second_ too slow- if it hadn’t been so crowded…”

“Hey, hey- it’s alright,” Rex didn’t know what else to say, “Don’t focus on the what-ifs, you’re safe now. It’s okay.”

“The Empire sent that creature,” she wrapped her arms around her knees, hugging them closer to her chest, making herself smaller, “They’re hunting down people like me. That could’ve been me, dead in the street.”

“I wouldn’t have let that happen,” Rex said without hesitation, almost growling the words with how serious he was. 

“Rex,” Ahsoka said his name as a sigh, tinged with sadness, even as she gave him the smallest hints of a smile. It quickly faded as her face fell, and she shifted her position, sitting cross-legged like he was. She leaned in, reaching for Rex’s hands, and twining their fingers together. But even his familiar touch didn’t seem to cheer her up.

“Please, Ahsoka,” Rex leaned closer as well, close enough that he could press his forehead against hers, “I won’t let anything happen to you.”

She seemed like she wanted to believe him for just a moment, but she closed her eyes and sighed shakily, and Rex felt her breath on his lips with their proximity. She said, almost as a whimper, “I’m putting you in danger. The Empire would kill a renegade clone just as soon as they’d kill a renegade Jedi,” Ahsoka took a trembling breath, “Just by protecting me, by _being_ with me, you could be...” she trailed off, not wanting to finish the thought.

“It’s my job to keep you safe.”

“It _was_ your job! _Was!_ ” Ahsoka pulled back to look him in the eyes, “When you were my Captain! But- there is no Grand Army of the Republic anymore! You don’t _have_ to protect me! You don’t _have_ to stay!”

Rex paused a moment, and then asked her quietly, “What if I _want_ to?”

“Don’t you understand?” Tears started to well up in Ahsoka’s eyes, “You’re putting a target on your back, Rex! You could _die_!”

“If it’s to keep you safe-“

“I _can’t_ lose you, Rex!” Ahsoka burst out, gasping through a sob, “You’re all I have left!”

 _“You’re all I have, too_ ,” was how Rex would have answered, but his breath caught in his throat.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry…” tears were rolling down Ahsoka’s cheeks, now. Rex cupped her chin in a hand, gently wiping them away with a thumb, “I- I _can’t_ , Rex! I can’t let you die… because of me.”

He thought of a thousand things to say, so many variants of _I love you,_ “I… understand,” 

“We- we can’t stay together,”

And Rex felt his heart breaking for the love of her, “I know.” He brought her into his embrace, like he had done that night so long ago in the mess hall of the _Resolute_ , holding her then to keep her comfortable, holding her now to keep her from falling apart. To keep himself from falling apart without her. 

He whispered as she started to fall asleep, exhausted from crying, “Just… stay safe, Littl’un. For me.”

***

Part of Rex wanted to blame Wolffe. Scratch that- _most_ of Rex wanted to blame Wolffe. But he couldn’t be angry at him, not after everything.

The clone Commander had never adjusted well after Order 66, constantly paranoid, with hair-trigger reflexes should someone even _start_ to say the word ‘Jedi’. Gregor wasn’t much better, if Rex was being honest- he had his good days and bad days, but that wasn’t his fault, either. The man had been alone, losing his mind long before the Republic fell. 

But they were still his brothers.

Rex couldn’t remember how many years it had been- time didn’t seem to have much meaning in the middle of scenic nowhere on the rock that was Seelos, baking under the sun, dodging dust storms, hunting Joopa. Before, he’d been determined to find more of his brothers, more who had survived the Order- to find them and remove their chips. And he’d tried searching for Cody, or for Echo and the Bad Batch, or even for Kix, but all his leads went cold, eventually. 

Then, he’d found Wolffe, and the two of them had found Gregor. And the three of them together made it seem like it was enough, at least for a while. It was enough to distract themselves and waste the time away. 

And when the Rebellion somehow made its way to Seelos, Rex was sure that he’d refuse its call.

Until the Jedi mentioned Ahsoka Tano. 

He hadn’t heard from her in years; before she’d left, she’d promised to try and stay in touch. Which she did, until she suddenly didn’t. Rex used to ask Wolffe if they’d received any messages, but the answer was always the same. He’d eventually stopped asking.

Now, he knew why. 

But he still couldn’t blame his brother- Wolffe had been scared, and in his panicked, triggered mind, he could only believe that the Jedi wanted revenge, never that any of them could still be on their side. 

The Jedi kid, Ezra (padawan, Rex remembered) had asked him multiple times if he was going to come back with them, to join the Rebellion, to help their cause. Verbally, Rex had refused- his war was over, he said, the clones had outlasted their purpose. But he knew he was kidding himself. Even knowing he’d have to put up with the grumpy one, Kanan, Rex knew he would be coming back in a heartbeat. 

Their freighter, the _Ghost_ docked into a much larger ship; the Rebellion was much better-equipped than Rex had initially thought, but Sabine, the Mandalorian girl was quick to point out that they used to have more of a fleet, and it was still no substitute for a proper base of operations. 

Rex took a moment to collect himself as the rest of the crew disembarked. “I think she’s been waiting up for you,” Ezra told him as he passed by. Rex just nodded- _Jedi_. He’d missed this. 

They led him into a brightly-lit hallway. A sudden, panicked jumble of thoughts burst its way into Rex’s head- what if she didn’t actually want to see him? What if she didn’t want him to stay? What if he’d changed too much? 

No, he couldn’t think like that, now. He forced those thoughts out of his head as the _Ghost_ crew parted for him, while he not-quite-shouldered his way past. 

And there she was.

“Commander,” was all Rex could say, unable to keep a smile off his face. 

Ahsoka’s eyes widened as she moved towards him- she was taller, now, and so elegant. She still wasn’t quite at eye-level with him, but her pointed montrals made her seem like they were about the same height. And her lekku were longer, the blue stripes becoming more wavy and thin, the white patterns on her face had shifted, becoming more pointed and delicate, contouring her features. She was… incredible.

“You got old,” Rex joked when she was close enough, and prepared himself, because the next thing he’d get to hear would be her voice.

She breathed a laugh- what a wonderful sound, “Had to happen sometime, Rex.”

And then, after a pause, it was almost as if she couldn’t hold herself back any longer, and she suddenly threw her arms around his neck. 

Rex was surprised, and then felt so happy, his heart could have sang. He immediately wrapped his arms around her waist, pressing as close to her as he could, given the circumstance. He just… took her in, whispering to her, “I’m glad you’re still alive.”

“You, too,” he heard her say.

It was then when Rex remembered that the _Ghost_ crew was still standing in the hallway behind them. He reluctantly pulled away from Ahsoka, gesturing to them, “Well, I wouldn’t be, if it weren’t for these guys.”

Ahsoka looked grateful, nodding, “Thank you for trusting my friend.”

Kanan chuckled shortly, “It wasn’t easy,” his expression darkened, and Rex avoided his turquoise gaze, “It’s still not.”

“Nothing worth doing ever is,” Ahsoka assured him, turning towards the ship’s bridge, subtly motioning for Rex and the rest of them to follow.

Rex did, of course. He would follow her anywhere.

*

It wasn’t until later that Ahsoka was finally able to be alone with her Captain. She took him into her room on the command ship, immediately wrapping her arms around his waist as soon as the door slid shut. He returned the favor heartily, and Ahsoka felt the Force _sing_ with just how _right_ it was to be in his arms once again. 

“I missed you,” she whispered against his neck, “I missed you _so_ much.”

“I missed you, too, Littl’un,” Rex laughed, pulling away for a moment, his hands still on her hips, “Though… not so little anymore, are you?”

Ahsoka just grinned at him, shrugging playfully, “Guess not.”

She pressed her forehead against his, and immediately felt him stiffen, a mixture of emotions came at her through the Force: pure joy (that hadn’t dissipated for even a second), disbelief and excitement at just at _seeing_ her again, but at the touch of that light headbutt, Ahsoka felt the mental equivalent of ‘whoa’. 

Leaning back, she looked at him, still getting used to not seeing his blond hair anymore, “Something wrong?”

“No, it’s- ah, um…” Rex seemed suddenly unsure of himself and brought a hand through his beard in a very Kenobi-esque fashion, “Did- did you uh, mean to do that? To uh… kiss me?”

 _What?_ “I… I didn’t kiss you?” Ahsoka was confused, not to say that she hadn’t thought about it before. 

“Oh, right!” His amber eyes were wide, avoiding her stare, and a blush was creeping into his cheeks- slightly less visible under the white of his beard, now, “It’s a- it’s a Mandalorian thing- a Keldabe kiss, touching foreheads together like that. Sorry- I just…” he trailed off, rubbing the back of his now-bald head, and Ahsoka wordlessly invited him to sit on her bed with her (given that this immediately followed what he’d just said, Rex only hesitated for a moment, starting a light protest, but Ahsoka just rolled her eyes fondly at him), tugging him by the hand, and sitting across from him, as close as she could. Their knees brushed together, both of them sitting cross-legged. It was then that a memory suddenly surfaced in Ahsoka’s mind.

“Wait a second- you did that to me before! The Keldabe kiss thing! After we saw that Inquisitor, you gave me a little headbutt while I was-,” Ahsoka couldn’t help it, she started giggling, “while I was a mess on the floor!”

“I…”

“Rex!” She shoved his shoulder, “I can’t believe you kissed me and didn’t tell me about it!”

It seemed as though Rex couldn’t hold it in any longer either, and he started laughing, too. It was almost like they were back in the _Resolute_ ’s cafeteria, dissolving into hysterics, laughing long and loud. 

Ahsoka wiped away a tear from the corner of her eye, and decided to just say it, “I can kiss you for real, if you’d like.”

She actually heard his heartbeat start to race as his eyes widened, “Wh- what do you-?”

“Nobody really outranks me, anymore,” Ahsoka couldn’t stop smiling at him, it was more than she’d done in what felt like a long time, “So no one can tell me I can’t.”

His face cycled through a series of expressions, starting impossibly excited, but settling into a kind of resigned, somber smile, not meeting her eyes, “I- I want to, but…”

Ahsoka just waited for him to continue.

“I’m old,” he said it so sadly, even with that small smile spread across his lips- he said it like he had long accepted it, “You deserve better. You deserve someone who can give you their whole life.”

Ahsoka just shook her head, breathing a laugh, “You already have.”

She heard him gasp softly, as though that was the last answer he could have ever expected. _Oh, she loved him._

And she leaned closer to Rex, finally pressing her lips against his. It was soft and long and sweet, and his beard kind of tickled, but Ahsoka just giggled against his mouth, kissing him anyway. She opened her eyes, seeing that he’d started laughing, too, looking at her with eyes so full of love, and she kissed his smile. 

He brought his arms around her, still strong after all this time, still keeping her safe, and pressed their foreheads together again. Ahsoka settled in against him, laying her head against Rex’s chest, and she felt him plant a kiss on the hollow space between her montrals. 

“There’s something the General used to say,” Rex started, and Ahsoka refused to let her thoughts darken at the memory of her Master, this time. The revelation that had knocked her out on the _Ghost_ while fighting off that single TIE- she would think on it later. Rex was here, now, and he could carry it with her. She hummed that she was still listening, and Rex went on, “He actually stole it from me, though.”

“Wow, how dare you, Skyguy,” Ahsoka muttered, feeling a bit of her long-absent little-sister-of-Anakin energy returning at the use of her old nickname for him, despite everything. Rex laughed and hugged her tighter. 

“Yeah, I know,” Rex was absently rubbing circles into her palm, and brought her hand to his lips, placing a kiss on her knuckles just because he could, “But anyway, it went like this: life is short, and there are only a few good things in it, really. You shouldn’t pretend that one isn’t happening.”

Ahsoka sighed contentedly, “I like that.” It was a distinctly _not-Jedi_ sentiment. 

He gently turned her face towards his own again, kissing her forehead, “‘Soka, you’re my good thing.”

Ahsoka’s heart could have burst for the love of him, “And you’re mine.”

Life _was_ short, and good things were scarce in a galaxy darkened by evil and hate. But they had hope and the desire to make a change for the better. And they had each other. 

Neither of them had to pretend, anymore.

**Author's Note:**

> -this was originally going to be shorter, but... it got away from me  
> -it was also originally going to be an exploration of various relationships in star war and TCW, hence the title, but I thought it still fit with the final product. the original idea still might get written one day, maybe it'll become part of Epithets  
> -the 'making love in a canoe' coffee and 'I was born a mon-calamari' jokes are both from random tumblr stories I've read, just modified for star war (like, it was 'I was born a fish' IRL lol)  
> -Rex and Anakin's repeated 'life is short and there are only a few good things in it' lines are from Suzanne Collins' The Underland Chronicles series, which I highly recommend  
> -Rex is Ace, you gotta deal with it cuz I'm Ace and it's important to me  
> -I wrote 'there's a puffer pig loose in the air vents' and only realized later that its basically the John Mulaney 'horse in the hospital' sketch but for space  
> -the bit about Tup's name being for his hairdo is my own personal headcannon, I actually don't know the real reason he's called that  
> -Ahsoka's explanation for her name comes from Dave Filoni's (I think it was him anyway) confirmation that it was inspired by the historical emperor(?) of India, Ashoka; I just commandeered some information from wikipedia  
> -the bit about 'accidental injuries vis-a-vis Ahsoka's fangs and Rex's head' was inspired by true events where I fell off a rock once and onto some other kid and accidentally bit his head. it was hilarious  
> -Hustle, Soapy, Achilles, and Nine are just various clone names I've had in my head for a while, and decided to give them some screen time  
> -I left the identity of the inquisitor vague, they could have been any of them from Rebels or that game with Cal Kestis whose name escapes me  
> -I channeled my 'i miss my long-distance-relationship-partner-during-this-pandemic' into the last part, in case you couldn't tell


End file.
